


Fighting Demons (The First Age)

by AJHunter



Category: Wheel of Time - Robert Jordan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Interactive Fiction, The First Age, past/future
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-04
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-03-16 07:50:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3480206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AJHunter/pseuds/AJHunter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nox and Aria make a trip to the United States.  Nox shows Aria around his stomping grounds, and prepares to take his life to Moscow.  They meet another hunter, Jacinda Cross, a renowned hunter, that they've both heard of.  Along the way mysteries are uncovered.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Business as Usual

**Author's Note:**

> Time is a wheel, futures become pasts and the past becomes the future. This is a standalone piece, but relies heavily on the lore created by The First Age RPG (http://thefirstage.org), some events mentioned have taken place in game and are not explained fully in this work. The basic premise behind the world is that channeling has been eradicated in a past age, and is now emerging into the modern world (specifically started in 2045), this is a excerpt of the life of three hunters sworn to hunt down the Gods of old (aka channelers).

**** Nox ****

Blood covered everything. It was on the walls, the ceiling. There was no telling which way it all came from, it came from everywhere. Nox stood in the middle surveying everything without a light, it was dark, but yet somehow he could see more than just the shadows. The Atharim here in Moscow got all kinds of neat toys. The googles were by far his favorite and Aria's desire to make them more useful to hunters was a grand idea. He loved that Aurora took it up. His sister was a god with technology. Nox laughed at the irony of the statement - the Atharim thought they were gods. 

It had taken a while to get used to hiding his power from others in the organization. But Aria he trusted. She'd proven time and time again he wasn't her target, no matter the look in her eye. She was a scary person, thank the heavens she was on our side.

The land warriors were a godsend, he loved hunting the monsters on their home turf. He loved knowing that they were there, and that he would take then out. Aria helped. Well she did more than help but he wouldn't tell her that. She enjoyed the hunt as much as he did, maybe a lot more, he grinned at her as she searched for a hint of where they had gone. 

Tracking in the city was a lot more difficult than tracking in the middle of the wilderness. He didn't think he could have stayed in Moscow if it weren't for Aria's unique talents. She could feel their emotions, sense which way they went and follow them. She'd lead them to many a monsters lair in the short time they'd known each other. That first meeting had been epic and they repeated it over and over again. The hunting part got better and better and the actual fight was glorious. The power would course through his veins and he was unstoppable, if he could only do more than one thing at a time. If only!

They were tracking some monster, they didn't know, and really it didn't matter. The only real issue they had with the tunnel monsters were the dranaika, their ability to foresee the future made them a bitch to kill. Aria had one to her credit, at least that's what the records say. Aria on the hand denied the kill and would't talk about it. He could see the fear in her eyes when he brought it up.

Aria signaled for him to follow and he did. Nox took note for Aurora. They were mapping the tunnels as they explored too. That was one of the side affects of using the land warriors, and why he was the one wearing them. That and the fact that they were cool.

Following Aria was always a treat but the large trench coat almost always hid what he wanted to look at. She glanced back at him with that look and he grinned back at her. She was with Lucas, yeah yeah yeah, I know, but he couldn't help it. He couldn't imagine what it was like to be with her. Her abilities were one of a kind, she'd shared with him before, but usually it was to calm him down, or to show him something without speaking. It was unique, he both envied and was glad he wasn't Lucas. She was a handful without adding sex to the mix. His mind had wandered and he ran into Aria who was standing staring at him with that look still. He laughed and leaned down and kissed her forehead. She still glared at him. "You know I love you."

It was a truth, but not like that. She was like a sister now, more or less, but that didn't mean he was going to stop looking at her. She resumed her tracking. Nox dutifully followed, trying to pay attention to the lay of the land and everything else around. This place was creepy.

**** Aria ****

Nox had a three tracks, drinking, hunting and sex. It was what he lived for. Though his drinking had definitely taking a back seat to the others, Aria knew it was because he was getting the high he liked from the hunt. He enjoyed it almost as much as she did. It was good to know that he felt similarly, but his wasn't drawn on the need to kill, to hurt, to draw pain, his was just the pure high you get from surviving, for fighting, the whole life thing. Aria preferred the dying part. They were two sides of the same coin. And the more she went down the darker paths with Nox, the more she had to rely on her ability to pull back. It was harder each day with Nox, but he kept the sanity intact, was an anchor to cling to when Lucas wasn't around. 

She'd tried to hunt with Lucas. She'd tried to keep him close, but her feelings for him clouded everything. Together they could hunt, but they couldn't take on more than one or two creatures at a time. Aria constantly worried about him. Worried he'd get bitten, or scratched by the wrong creature. Or that he'd not be fast enough to stay out of the way of things. It was a life choice, one that he had not made. With Nox there was no worry, there was no second guessing the plan. Aria dared to say she loved Lucas, but only because she had no other word for what she felt when with him. She'd become enamored with him almost instantly, but that grew into a friendship. She could tell him anything, well almost anything. He still didn't know the depths of her darkness. The fight that she had everyday and mostly every night. The fight to not find someone to hunt, to kill just for the pure pleasure of it all. It was the struggle that he had drawn on paper and then inked permanently onto her arm. The struggle that defined her life. And Nox was capable of grounding her in a fight, Lucas was the light in her life and the only reason she came back from the darkness.

They were hunting now, the tunnels were dark. The air was damp and stale. They were getting close, she could feel the den ahead, more than one creature was hiding with in the depths of it. Nox would enjoy it, and so would she. They had been walking the tunnels for a few hours before they found a site that looked promising, and now they were heading into that fight. Aria could feel the hunger. But more she could feel the fear of a victim. One living victim, Aria didn't know the condition of the human in hands of the monsters. She could be too far gone, but they would try to help. Neither she nor Nox wanted to take human life.

Some of the monsters were satisfied, no longer hungry. Aria didn't want to see how many dead there were. She prayed that casualties were minimal, but she doubted that would be the case.

Nox went first with the land warriors in the dark. He would have gone first either way. Aria was more than happy to let him. It was one of the reasons they got along so well. He liked to take charge, wrong or right, it was his way or the highway. Aria was more inclined to follow him. She didn't mind following him, he rarely lead her wrong, at least they hadn't died yet.

**** Nox ****

Nox went first. He smiled at the missing fight. He and Aurora would have been at it, planning and plotting and determining the best course of action. It was a big reason he'd started with hunting with Aria and Aurora was happy to oblige, she could sit and do the research she wanted without the pain of having to hunt too. They had different tastes that was for sure.

He could see the rougarou through the land warriors. One was dining on a girl. Poor kid! She was afraid, Nox spared a glance back at Aria who was already feeling things pretty badly. Her eyes showed the tale tell signs of her hunger. He only knew the smallest depths of it, he'd seen it too often not to ask. She would be unstoppable soon, and it could mean their lives if she let it go. Nox reached back and squeezed her hand, it seemed to bring her out of it a little. 

Nox grabbed the power and made the weave for his flaming whip and sent it flying at the dining monster. It coiled around its neck and the stench of flesh and hair immediately filled the air. Nox only saw Aria slip behind him and dispatched another out of the corner of his eye, he was aware of her, with his distance he had to be. The other three creatures rushed them. And Nox stood back and watched as Aria moved like the wind. He would never be as good as she was. But he hadn't practiced nearly every day for his entire life either. It was a dance, one he'd watched often enough, and one he tried ever so hard to fight. She was amazing, but he'd never tell her that. He'd find some excuse, some hole or some reason to poke fun at her. She took it well, the ribbing. Another reason he liked her. 

The fury of the fight was minimal. He pulled a rougarou off her back with his whip, she'd started to toy with the creatures. She wanted the fight, wanted to cause pain, and for her, Nox knew her pain was the most intoxicating of them all. She was a danger to herself more than anyone else in the entirety of the world. He felt bad for her. But the feelings were short lived as he yanked the whip again, adding a bit more razor to the edges of the weave as he did, the head was severed cleanly from the body. No spraying spurts of blood followed, to both of their disappointment, but it would mean less of a clean up for them later. And Nox intended to hit a bar afterwards. He didn't share Bas' fundamental need to get laid after a fight, but it didn't hurt and now that the pain from the plane crash was dying down, he had some energy left over.

**** Aria ****

The fight was quick. The rougarous weren't hungry, they weren't chomping at the bit to bite the flesh of their bodies, they were slow and sluggish, and three full monsters was hardly any fun at all. The fear from the girl fueled Aria's fight, it brought deep feelings from with in up, it made her body shake with excitement. The death and loss of connection brought more pleasure. The kill was intoxicating. The last connection to that being, their dying moment, the moment of loss of hope, knowing there was nothing more but darkness. 

Nox beheaded the last creature and Aria drank in the girls fear. Nox would deal with her, Aria had to collect herself. Having a living victim was worse than them all being dead. The fear never stopped, the hunger fed and Aria wanted to kill more than ever. It was powerful, and Aria had to concentrate on that little light inside her, had to find the hope and the desire to fight back. Lucas was her reason to come back. She would come back for him. Not because he was her all, but she didn't want all his help to be for naught. The memories of him were far more powerful than he even knew. He was her anchor to the real world. He was why she came back. 

Aria felt Nox caress her check and then grab her shoulder. He was empty, the power flowed throw him. She looked up at him. He grinned at her, it was his you are okay grin. Aria could read his expression even if she couldn't read him. She took a deep breath and found the light, let it calm her let it be her. She was not that person, not the killer her hunger wanted her to be. It was a slow transition, more like the chemicals in her body were returning to normal, and she was sure that was part of it. 

Nox smiled, a happy smile. He dropped the power and Aria could feel him again, feel the calm and Aria centered on him. It was not Lucas by any means, but Nox understood, he understood much more than Lucas did, the extent to which Aria could go for the sake of that hunger and the ultimate pleasure.

**** Nox ****

It was always a good day when Aria came back to reality. It wasn't easy. He knew that much anyway. He didn't want to know the full brunt of it, she could show him. He knew his weaknesses. He could easily follow the white rabbit down the hole. Nox was 100% certain Aria was stronger than he was in that regard. He knew he couldn't come back from what she felt during the fight. It was hard enough for him to stop as it was. He enjoyed it. He did. He thrived on it. With Aria it was all about the hunt, there wasn't research, it was about the kill. It was ridding the world of these horrible creatures. In Moscow you didn't have to scour the paper, though Aurora still sent them out specifically on those type missions. But if they were jonesing for a fight, all they had to do was dip down beneath the surface and head into the darkness, head into the home of beasts unfathomable. Thankfully they had not found any creatures like the had the day he and Aria had met. Aria still didn't know what they were. And even through everything Aurora looked through she didn't know what the were, so all in all they were screwed!

Aria back to normal Nox headed over to the girl. Her head slumped against her chest, Nox could see the wounds on her body. He sighed, he wasn't sure she'd make it, blood loss alone, they had a long walk ahead of them to get back to the surface. 

He and Aria had set up plans beforehand for these exact times. Well Aurora had set them up, he and Aria had to employ it. They'd patch her up, that was one thing Aria had training in. She had training in so many things it was really a wonder she could live as a human in the outside world. He laughed to himself, she had only just started living. And if it weren't for Lucas she'd probably just be a hunter anyway. He was glad she had Lucas. If only he could find a girl like her to keep him company at night. But he was good, really. The random girl at the bar was enough to keep things interesting. 

All they had to do now was get her top side, drop her off and call the paramedics. And pray to God that she didn't say anything about them. It wasn't typical Atharim protocol that they let the girl live. She was a witness, she could identify them. But they couldn't kill an innocent, it was wrong. Aria was already fighting her demons, and Nox wasn't about to have to start doing the same thing. Killing a human was just plain wrong.

Nox lifted the girl and she moaned in agonizing pain. How Aria did this he would never know. He carried her through the tunnels. Aria was on point with her sword drawn. The power still coursed through him, and a fireball weave waited in proximity as he walked. He could release it at any time if need be. But thankfully the return trip was uneventful. They'd made it to the surface and the girl had passed out. Her breathing was ragged, but she was breathing, so that was a plus. 

Now out in the sun, the girl looked worse for wear. Her clothes were covered in sludge, her hair was matted with blood and grime. She wreaked of death. There were pieces of her flesh missing, and a few fingers and ears too. She would survive, but Nox wasn't sure he'd want to. But it wasn't his call, he wasn't going to make that kill happen, he didn't care what kind of reprimand he would get for it. 

That was the biggest difference here in Moscow versus being back home in the States. The freedom back home was grand. There were no bosses, there were no regular check ins. It was every hunter for himself. But this organization stuff, it had it's benefits. But Nox did miss home.

Aria called the paramedics and they left the girl propped against the wall in the mouth of an alleyway. Both of them walked away, Nox hadn't noticed when Aria put the sword away, but she had, her trench coat was pulled tight and unless you were paying attention, you'd not know she was packing any heat under that long leather trench coat she favored.


	2. Come With Me

**** Nox ****

The hunt had gone well. They'd gone their separate ways, it was usual for that. Aria typically went home to call Lucas after a hunt, finish getting her head on straight. Nox he had other things he wanted to do, but he stopped at a pub and sat down at bar and drank a beer alone. He could have gone out, found a girl and brought her home, had some fun and sent her packing. Today he just wanted to drink alone. 

It was the anniversary of his mother's death. Hunting had helped, Aria knew it and it was the reason they'd gone out in the first place, though she never said so much. Kept his mind from the horrors he had witnessed. A man left the old school news paper on the bar. He didn't look old enough to have one as a kid, but his Dad, he had, and he had picked it up from him. Maybe it was a similar way for the man who'd left it.

Nox picked up the paper and moved to a booth, against the wall, was easier to relax and read it. The CCD spoke English, but their style of paper was different. It was funny the man had been reading the New York Times. Their front page news was typical. But it wasn't the front page Nox wanted. He looked for the bizarre articles in the back. Nothing really stood out to him.

Nox remembered all the good times at home. He missed home, he missed his car. He could bring it back? One last nostalgia tour, he could show Aria around his stomping grounds. That could be fun. She lived such a sheltered life, getting her out of here, on the road, where he had grown up. It could be fun. 

But he'd have to talk to her about it. Talk to Aurora, and no doubt Aria would have to talk with Lucas. Girl claimed he was just a friend, but it was so very much more and it was obvious they cared a great deal for each other. He was envious, and then not. Aria worried about him, and he knew Lucas worried about her. Hunting was dangerous. Lucas was going to lose Aria at some point, and there wasn't going to be much he could do about it, except make Aria stop and that was going to be one sure way to lose her. Nox was so very glad he wasn't in that committed relationship. He needed Aria, and she him, but there were no complications, they understood the game, understood the risks and the nature of their jobs. And they both knew it was no one's fault in the end.

Nox finished his beer. He got up out of the booth and headed for the door, dropping the paper on the bar for the next curious person to pick up. It wasn't his after all.

**** Nox ****

Nox hadn't had a chance to talk to Aria about going state-side. It had been a busy couple of days, between follow up doctor appointments and his typical day on the job, he'd not actually seen Aria. More her fault than his, he was pretty much like a clock, followed the same pattern almost everyday. 8am rise, head to Gracie's for a quick workout, breakfast and so on, almost always the same every day. And that included hunting with Aria at night. She kept strange hours. He was often up well past 2am hunting. Which was all good. Some days she was on day light hours.

Nox understood the reasons, but still it made her life a mess. His was not. He had to follow the pattern or he'd go so off tangent he might not ever find his way back, that was what happened with his dad. He lost his focus, and went on a tangent, he never came back from it.

But today he was taking Aria to see Alex. She usually went alone, but they were going to hit the tunnels afterwards and see if anything caught their fancy. He could talk to her when he picked her up. He'd have to persuade her to actually ride the metro, she could walk the whole city, she probably had. 

**** Aria ****

A knock on her door had to be Nox, she called out "Come in, it's unlocked." Aria finished strapping on her sword and smiled at Nox as he opened the door. "All set."

He laughed. "Perfect timing I see."

Aria smiled as she pulled on her trench coat. And they left down the back stairs and not through the shop. Alex was interested in meeting Nox, this would be the first time they'd actually sat down together. And then they'd hit the tunnels and do some more scouting.

Nox insisted they take the metro. He didn't mind the walking, but she knew that he didn't want to walk all the way to the coffee shop she and Alex met at. Aria also got the feeling he wanted to be able to talk.

And sure enough, once they got on the train, Nox started. "I had a thought."

Aria smiled, she knew exactly what Aurora would say. 'Thinking is dangerous, Nox, you better stop that.' And from the goofy grin on his face, Nox knew that was what she was thinking.

"Yeah I know," he chimed in, "Aurora has her thoughts on me thinking. But I need to get my Jeep and bring it here. I miss her, and having a car would be good, even if we stay here in Moscow."

Aria was confused and wondered what that had to do with her. "And?"

Nox laughed nervously. "Come with me. I'll show you around the States, kick around a few places before coming back here. I like it here, but I miss home too." He smiled proudly, "Let me show you my home."

He didn't want to go alone, Aria smiled. "Why not go with Aurora? I'm sure she misses it too." 

Nox frowned. "We get along well enough, but with you around it's always better. Please?"

Nox pleaded with her. Aria wasn't exactly sure about the whole thing, it would require a flight or passage by boat, and neither were really her cup of tea. "I don't think I can get there safely."

Nox wrapped his arm around her. "I'll help you, you help me. Flying isn't exactly top priority on my list either. We'll get each other through it."

Aria sighed, she still wasn't sure, but it would be good to get away from here for a while, and seeing America was something she'd never thought she'd do. "I need to talk with Lucas, make sure he's okay with me going anywhere with you."

Nox laughed. "You do that. I'll ask Aurora if she wants to go. Tell Lucas he's welcome to come, but I know that it limits your hunting if he tags along. So your call, Aria."


	3. Sacrafices

**** Aria ****

Aria agreed to talk with Lucas. It wasn't like she needed permission, but she couldn't exactly go off with another guy for however long without telling him in the least. And he might not like the idea, and Lucas meant a lot more than Nox did in terms of her happiness. And Nox understood, she hoped.

Lucas was at Dueling Dragons, he felt like he was doing the financial thing again, the thing he hated most about running his shop. She smiled as she walked in and the bell gave it's soft ring as she entered. 

Sergei looked up with a smile and a nod then went back to his work. He was drawing, the shop was quiet for once. There was no pain, only the remnants of it. It was still a draw to come here and sit for no reason other than to be here, watching Lucas was a plus, but even if he wasn't here it was still a nice wait. 

Aria wrapped her arms around Lucas neck from behind him as he sat. She looked over his shoulder and saw the numbers he was crunching. "I need to talk to you about a proposal Nox made, when you've some free time."

**** Lucas ****

Lucas was irritated. He hated this part of the business. But he had to do it. His back was to the door and he was concentrating, trying to get everything straight. It's not that things didn't make sense. He just had to make sure everything in the spreadsheet went where it was supposed to. Stupid software was supposed to make it easier to anticpate inventory as well as to let them know how they were doing. As if he couldn't just go and look at the the ink and see if they were low or something. But Valentin had required it. He knew he wasn't being a jerk. He was trying to make sure Lucas knew how to run a business. Still, more than likely, Lucas would probably hire someone to do all the books, if it ever came down to it. If Valentin was gone, that is. He didn't like thinking about that, but you had to be realistic. The man was getting older. It was a fact of life. Well, he had enough facts for the day.

The bell dinged but he didn't turn around. Sergei could take care of whoever it was. He closed his eyes and sighed. He'd probably knock off early anyway. He was tired and feeling lazy. Unless he had reason to, he'd probably skip the gym today. Honestly, all he really wanted to do was nothing- go home and relax. Maybe call up Aria. That made him feel better. Yeah, it'd be nice to play, of course. But even just curl up with her. For some reason, he didn't feel like doing anything but just laying next to her and relaxing. Maybe watch TV or read. But just hang out.

He felt arms go around his neck and her cheek and lips against his cheek and ears, the feel of her breasts against his back. He smiled. Maybe _he_ was magic, because suddenly she was there as if summoned. He turned to look at her. Maybe the rest of his wish would come true too.

"I need to talk to you about a proposal Nox made, when you've some free time." He frowned at that. He liked Nox pretty well. He was a good guy, as far as he could tell. And while it was kinda obvious he thought Aria was attractive, he was also respectful to Lucas. They seemed to get on almost like siblings. Certainly Nox treated Aria about the same as he did his sister Aurora. Obviously, Lucas would rather have been Aria's partner than Nox. But he just didn't have the training and ability either of them had. And he'd seen Aria take a hit or a wound trying to protect him. She had shared her fear for him later that night, even as they had made passionate love. Being with him compromised her. He got it. He did. But it still bothered him that he couldn't be there for her. Nox could, though. His surrogate. Aria could- and had- let him get hurt. It wasn't something he was proud of, but seeing Nox with that nice gash in his arm had felt....good. Aria didn't panic with Nox there, didn't get afraid or second guess herself. 

She was what she was. He knew that as much as he wanted to, he couldn't take that from her. It was what she was, what she did. He couldn't stop her. Nor should he. She did good work. So he let her go without him, to give her the best chance. And was glad that she had a partner like Nox, one that she could trust and who had her back, but that she would be able to concentrate on the job. It was a good thing. It was. He kept telling himself that.

"Any break from these numbers is great." He turned around and pulled her down into his lap. He enjoyed the feel of her bottom on him. His arms went around her waist and he kissed her. "So...proposal. He trying to poach you?" He didn't think so. It was a joke. He trusted Nox. More importantly, he trusted Aria. She would _never_ betray him, never cheat on him. It just wasn't who she was.

**** Aria ****

Lucas pulled Aria into his lap and she nearly melted at his touch, his kiss made her heart leap and she wanted nothing more than to stay there forever. But life goes on around them, and it's not possible to stay in that moment forever.

Aria smiled at his comment, she could feel the joke that was only mildly tinged with fear. He worried, but there was nothing between her and Nox, and both of them made sure of that. Aria knew and felt that Nox was still something Lucas wasn't happy about. "In a sense." Aria smiled, watching the emotions play through Lucas' eyes. She hoped he understood it was just a reply to his joke. "He wants me to go to the United States with him for a few months. Show me his stomping grounds, and get their gear. He likes it here. Wants to stay. But he misses his ride. And wants one last hurrah at home."

Aria still wasn't looking forward to the plane ride. She hated flying. She hated boats. They were confining, there was no place to get off if she had to. It was all or nothing. But it could be fun beyond that part of it. But Aria didn't want to make Lucas feel worse about the arrangement they all had.

**** Lucas ****

Lucas listened with a sinking feeling. The United States. It was a long way away. She'd be gone a long time. While he didn't like that, he could live with that part. But what if something happened to her over there? What if she got hurt? Killed? He'd not be able to get to her.

He knew that didn't make sense. She could get hurt or killed here too. She went out at night and hunted. She'd come by his place and he'd see the bruises or cuts on her naked body. He knew what they were. It tore at him, to see them. But he lived with it. Barely, but he did. He could tell her to back off, to take a day. To be careful. He could cheer her up, could do fun things with her. Could feel like he balanced her, that his time with her somehow...lessened the pains she went through. Maybe it did. He knew she depended on him. It made it bearable for him.

But if she was there...he be able to do little. They could talk on the phone, but that was it. He couldn't draw a bath for her or rub ointment into a bruise or treat a wound. He couldn't wake her up with a kiss and breakfast, couldn't give her pleasure to overwhelm her, to balance out the pain. He wouldn't be there for her. 

And yet he knew he couldn't tell her not to go. It wasn't his place. He couldn't change her, didn't want to change her. He just wanted her to be happy, to make her happy. He knew what she'd say, but he had to say it. "I'm going to go with you. Sergei can watch the shop. Valentin will keep the books. I can drop my classes. Let me go with you." He waited for her words. As he did, frustration built inside him. Anger. _That mother fucker Nox!!!_ He was going to have words with the guy. Nox was not gonna be laughing when he was done with him.

**** Aria ****

Aria could feel he didn't want her to go, his words were almost a surprise. He wanted to go. It was Aria's turn to be a mixed bag of emotions. She'd love to have Lucas to herself for a few months, nothing but the hunt, but that's exactly what it was going to be a hunt, one long endless hunt. The endless days of worrying, the sadness of seeing him hurt. Aria could feel his anger rising, it wasn't directed at her, she figured it was at probably Nox. 

Aria smiled. "Nox said you could come if you wanted to." Aria put her hand on his shoulder and made him look at her with the other hand. "But Lucas, this is going to be one long hunt. Nox has no home, he has no stationary place of residence. They moved around their whole life. We'll go from hunt to hunt, from cache to cache, with no end until we come home and all their gear is collected." She put both hands around his chin and smiled. "And you can't really leave here all of a sudden. Your classes are important, your clients too. It's your therapy." Aria knew none of that would really stop him from going. She wasn't exactly sure she wanted him to stay home either, but it was dangerous when he was around. Aria looked down. "You know I'd worry about you out there with me." Aria looked back up into his beautiful blue eyes, "I would give anything to think right with you around, but you are too special, you mean too much to me. I would die if you got hurt, or worse." A tear fell on to her check as she thought about it. "Losing you because of what I do would be the worst possible thing Lucas. There is no coming back from that."

**** Lucas ****

Lucas hung his head. She had won. Before he even had a chance. He'd known. She had a dangerous job, a dangerous life. Her surviving meant that she had to be at her best. His being with her would weaken her. It made him sick to his stomach, knowing that, knowing that the best way to ensure that she came back to him safely was for him to stay behind.

His male mind rebelled against that idea and he wanted to put his foot down, to insist that she stay. Fuck Nox and his 'last hurrah'! But the truth was he didn't own her. He didn't control her. If they were married, things might be different. Maybe. But they weren't. And in any case, he couldn't change her. She had abilities that made her different. She was special. And her life up to this point had only accentuated that.

She walked a line, always drawn to the darkness, the pain. The only thing that kept her from going over the edge was him. It's why she wasn't able to focus when he was with her. She was terrified of losing him. A part of him also worried at what she would be if something were to happen. The saddest thing to him was the fact that she'd lose her humanity, her goodness. Because she was good. She wanted to be good. She struggled to be good. He didn't kid himself. He had a feeling she'd done some things that it would bother him to know. He honestly didn't want to pry into that. The theory was one thing. The reality another. But he knew her, loved her. It was his job to protect her from herself. Ultimately, it was why he stayed with her but let her go alone. It was why he was there for her. It was why he was going to let her go alone. Because she deserved a chance at happiness. And that meant that he had to be alive and safe. It was codependent, he knew. But his heart was involved. And it meant that she was safe. That she had a measure of peace. 

It was his gift to her. His sacrifice. And he would bear it.

But yeah, Nox was going to get an earful from him. Big time.

He pulled her to him, burying his head against her chest, hearing her heartbeat. She was warm through her shirt. He was shaking he realized. Suddenly, terrified that he was losing her. He looked up into her beautiful green eyes. "I love you. I will be waiting when you come home. You promise to call me?" He searched her eyes, hoping- he didn't have to, he knew- that she knew how much she meant to him. Suddenly, he needed to be with her, wanted her badly, wanted to show her how much she meant to him.

**** Aria ****

Lucas hung his head, defeated, was the only feeling that she could describe, Aria's heart ached. He felt too much, she knew too much of what his thoughts were, the emotions inside. It wasn't fair, not really. Aria knew how much he cared, how much she meant to him, and there was nothing she could do that could ever show him in return. Even sharing what she felt, felt cheap in comparison. But it's not like she had a choice in the matter, she could choose to block everything out, but he was what kept her calm, safe, her reason for coming out of the darkness, no matter how deep she fell in. 

He said he loved her. Aria knew that, and she cared for him, probably was love, everyone else said it was love, but she still didn't know. Love wasn't a definable emotion, it was a bag of everything, and yet it had it's own name. Aria leaned in and kissed Lucas softly and whispered. "I love you too." She leaned back and smiled. "I'll probably annoy you with the amount I'll call." Aria could feel his desire, she glanced at Sergei and then at the books Lucas was doing. 

"I will get some food, you finish up here and I'll meet you at your place?" She smiled playfully. "Me and you, alone, until I have to leave to get on that damned plane." In truth Aria didn't know when that was, it could be days or weeks, but either way she was spending the rest of whatever time she had with Lucas.

**** Lucas ****

She loved him. Simple words. Profound words. Words to change a man's life, to give a man hope, a reason to live. He had lived without her and if he was honest, he would do so again. But life with her was real life. He didn't know where it would lead or what it meant, really. But he was happy.

He pulled her to him and just felt her against him. It was enough. After a bit, she looked up at Sergei. The man was studiously, concentration. And he had his headphones on. He smiled. The guy was doing his best to ignore them. She got up to leave, planning in meeting him later. He watched her leave, then looked over at Sergei.

Loudly he said, "She's gone."

Sergei looked up with a grin. "Yeah, I noticed." He put his pen down and stretched. He'd been at it for a while. Then he looked at Lucas. "So...I guess this isn't a casual thing is it?"

Lucas put his own pen down. "No. No, I don't think it is." Sergei was his friend and a good man. He trusted him with his life. But Aria and her secrets, well Sergei wouldn't understand. And it wasn't his to give. Still...."I don't know man. There's just something about her that pulls at me. She needs me."

Sergei listened and was quiet for a bit. "I know Lucas. I know. And it makes sense, given, well you know. How you grew up. Feeling unwanted."

Lucas knew he was right. A stab of fear pierced him. Was this just two damaged people using each other? He had told her he loved her. And he thought he did. At least, what he understood of love. He looked away and out the window for a bit. "I won't lie. I'm scared. We both are hurt, damaged. She gives me something. She wants me. Needs me. It makes me feel alive. Makes me feel like this is what I've been waiting for." He looked at Sergei. He was older and he was a good man. "Are we just using each other? I mean, I'm not asking you. I am saying that that is what I am afraid of."

He waited. The truth was, Sergei couldn't have the answer. But just talking to him, being honest about his fears, voicing them, that helped. Sergei looked down at his drawings and was quiet for a bit. Lucas watched the winter sun's light disappear and was about to get up to get his things when Sergei spoke.

"Love is unselfish and kind." The words were familiar, though he couldn't place them at the moment. "Love is about wanting the other person to be happy. There's nothing wrong with feeling that need, that...desire to do that." He looked at Lucas. "I think....I think the real problems come from it being only one person in the relationship who's doing the loving. Not the words. The actions." He looked at the door, as if he could still see Aria. "I don't know her. You do. I guess the only thing I would say is...just don't be the only one to love. Don't be the only one to sacrifice." As if sensing Lucas' discomfort he added, "You're a good man Lucas. One of the best I've known. I just want you to be happy man. You're my brother. I hope that she loves you the same way you love her."

Lucas wanted to respond, to defend her. But Sergei wasn't accusing her. He was just speaking his hopes. He wanted this to work for him. Lucas took a deep breath, pushing past the fear, and opened his heart to Sergei's words. He still loved Aria. He was sure of it. But he wouldn't be afraid of things not working out. Well, maybe he would, but he would risk it anyway. It was a chance he was taking, but he believed.

He laughed, the source of Sergei's words coming to him. With a smile he finished it. "Love believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails." He would hope.

He got up and got his jacket and as he walked to the door, he put his hand on Sergei's shoulder. "You're a good friend Sergei. The best. You're my brother." It was just a hand on the shoulder, but it was enough. A manly connection, two islands reaching out a hand of support or to lend comfort or wisdom. Sergei looked up at him with a wry smile.

"All right, go on. She's waiting." He winked. "I'm sure you both will be very busy tonight." His smile became a wicked grin. "I'll make sure to send you texts regularly to interrupt."

They both laughed and Lucas said his goodbye and walked out. It would be what it would be. He had his need to be loved and needed. And he believed in Aria. And in himself. He would hope this was as real as it felt. She would be gone a long time. So they had to make up for that lost time. 

Later, he might pay Nox a visit. Tomorrow or something. If he wasn't gonna go, then Nox better understand how things worked. And what his responsibilities were. And how pissed Lucas was at him.

But later.

**** Aria ****

Aria grabbed food from Salvetore's. It was easy enough to put in an order and have it ready by the time she got there. Victor made a big deal about it all. He wanted her to stay, to bring Lucas in again, promised to keep his nose out of their business. But Aria didn't think that was any better an idea. She really wanted to spend time with Lucas and only Lucas before she went off hunting with Nox.

Aria had said the three little words, and she felt how he'd felt in reaction. She really did want this to work out, all of it. She'd have to make it up to him, and now was just good as anytime to start.

They ate and chatted and Aria reassured Lucas of things, answered whatever questions he had. Promised to call, just as she did now, she would call him after the hunts, it was more for her than him. She needed the reassurance after the darkness crept in. The need to kill, to inflict pain and suffering, to end the presence in her mind, to make it vanish forever. It was all part of the darkness, and the need lingered even after she came back to Lucas. It was important to call him. Two months was a long time. Not as long as the time before she'd met Lucas, it was only a matter of months that she'd been alone, without mentor, guide, a friend. And then she found Lucas. It was sad to think that she had to meet Dane first before she'd met Lucas. But it was how it went.

Aria had to break before she found him. She'd walked past the tattoo shop for months before she ever felt the need to stop in. And only because of Dane she had. 

Aria and Lucas watched some TV but that didn't last long before they found themselves in the bedroom, exhausting themselves and building up for their extended separation. Aria had learned to control her ability but still chose to share with Lucas everything she felt. It was their connection, something only she could give him. There wasn't much she could give him other than that, there was little control over her life. What she did control she made sure Lucas was a part of it.

The night played out and Aria fell asleep in Lucas' arms content and satisfied. But she intended to spend as much time with him as possible until she left.


End file.
